Friendship in Four Parts (P2)

Titus 2:3-4

"The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness.... That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children." Titus 2:3-4

Being a Submissive Friend:

(Jesus to His Heaven Father)

We aren't just friends with our peers, but we can have a friendship with our authorities as well. I want you think about one mature Christian woman who is living the life that you wish you could have. Someone you admire and have great respect for. Write down their name. 

Philippians 3:17

"Brethren, be followers together of me, and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an ensample." Phil. 3:17

Jesus, from the start, displayed a friendship with God the Father. He was continuously looking for ways to connect with His Father. He would often go to a mountain to pray. He often said that He did whatever the Father commanded Him to do. He sought to please and imitate Him.

Paul tells us to be followers of him… as he followed Christ. We also read that older women are to instruct younger women. Look at older women around you in church. These women are trying to live God-honoring and pleasing lives. They are faithful to the ministry. They love their husbands and have raised their children. They love, care, and want to get to know you more. They have some experience and understanding of the Christian life.

Find one older Christian woman who is living the kind of life you'd like to have. It may not be the "ideal" or perfect life, but many women have characteristics, habits and life experiences which they are more than willing to share.. if only asked. Maybe it's a teen worker, maybe it's a wife/mother from church, maybe it's a pastor/deacon's wife, or maybe it's a godly mature "grandmother". You will not only make a friend but you will grow and mature a lot in your Christian walk.

READ - Phil. 4:9

"Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you." Phil. 4:9

     Building an Submissive Friendship:

     #1 Say Hi. Introduce yourself. (not all older people are scary)

     #2 Respect their leadership and authority. (Listen and obey their requests)

     #3 Get involved with the things they do or be in their ministry/outreach. (Be around them)

     #4 Help them with projects they have. (around the house, scrapbooking, their church ministry)

     #5 Watch them closely and observe what they do. (responding to conflict, treat their kids/spouse etc.)

     #6 Listen attentively to what they say. (you never know when you will find that pearl of wisdom!)

     #7 Imitate the good things. (Mimicry is the highest form of flattery)

     #8 Forgive them if they make a mistake. (We are ALL human.)

     #9 Pray for them daily. (For them to be a good leader, wife and example for you and others…)

     #10 Love them! :D

Friendship in Four Parts (P1)

"Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ." 1 Cor. 11:1

Christ's Example:

Who has ever felt alone?

Who has felt rejected or an oddball or just plain weird?

Who has wanted friends? (even just one..)

How many would love to see something great happen in one year?

Friendships are important. We need to begin developing traits for being a good friend to others and to form some lifelong friendships with those around us. We are Christians that means "Christ-like" or "followers of Christ." As we study Jesus' life, we see that He developed FOUR different kinds of friendships. 

Being a Spiritual Friend: 

(Jesus to Peter, James, and John)

I want you to think about someone who you would deem a spiritual person... Not just someone that is nice or has high standards, but someone who you think has a very close walk with Christ. Someone you admire among your peers.

Jesus had three "close" friends under Him. He would often separate them from the rest of disciples. They were Peter, James, and John. They became Christian leaders. Peter became the rock on which he built his church. (At first, He was unstable, but afterwards He became a solid rock for the Lord.) James wrote an epistle. John was the beloved of the Lord. Jesus invested a lot of time with these three. He showed them special events. He cared them, prayed for them, encouraged them, and loved for them. Who are your closest friends? Who do you spend the most time with? Write these names down.

1 Corinthians 2:14

"But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned." 1 Cor. 2:14

We naturally want to surround ourselves with people who are on the same level as we are. We don't always look for people who will challenge us and keep us accountable.We, naturally, like having friends who please us. This is a "natural" or carnal friendship. We often have these friendships because they make us feel good. We like to be comfortable! 

And yet there is another option. It's an "unnatural" or spiritual friendship. Remember how I asked you who you thought was most spiritual person in this group? It can be intimidating to try and build a friendship with someone who you feel is a "super christian"… But that person is someone who you know will pray for you if you have trials. A spiritual/Biblical friendship is based upon Jesus Christ. This friendship is best because it challenges our walk with Christ and encourages us to draw closer to Him. It often can turn into a lasting relationship.

John 13:35

"By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." John 13:35

My two closest friends now live out of these state. Honestly… at first, I didn't really want to be their friends. (Shocking, I know.) I admired them from a distance but was scared they would judge me for my flaws and imperfections or look down on me; instead, they have only loved me. They have inspired me and encouraged me in my Christian walk. They pray for me often. I'm thrilled that God gave me these sweet ladies to be my spiritual friends!

Here are some tips for...

     Growing Biblical Friendships:

     #1 Say hello and Sit by them in church. (everybody loves a smile :) )

     #2 Get to know them. Take it slow. (don't shove your friendship down their throat, relationships take time)

     #3 Ask for prayer requests. Pray for them and ask them to pray for you.

     #5 Be interested what they have to say. (Listen, don't just hear)

     #6 Share a Bible verse or a spiritual topic with them. (Compare notes, share ministry stories, edify each other)

     #7 Encourage them in their talents or abilities. (EVERYONE is self-conscious [I don't like public speaking] but I was encouraged by my husband)

     #8 Forgive them. (someone eventually somewhere will let you down, don't hold grudges)

     #9 Spend time with them. (Go on coffee date. Go bowling. Do a craft or project together)

     #10 Love them! :D

Pro. 27:17

"Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." Proverbs 27:17

     A spiritual friend will sharpen you. Be someone worth rubbing up against and you will be sharpened as well!